On the internet there is a free service, Diary Land (diaryland.com) that offers subscriber's the ability to post to a personal online diary that the server maintains for its members. diaryland.com claims to be a fun, free service where you can get your own easy to update web diary. Users of this service are not required to have any knowledge of html coding and simply type in their thoughts much as they would input sentences in an e-mail communication. These entries are then stored on the server and are available to anyone that happens upon them, either by design or by happenstance. All members of diaryland.com protect their privacy by cloaking themselves behind a chosen screen name much as many of us do when we adopt a pseudonym to use for our e-mail messages.
What follows in subsequent pages are the entries made by a twenty-eight year old female who resides in the New York area (possibly uptown Manhattan) and works in midtown Manhattan. This indiviual was working at her office in midtown Manhattan on September 11, 2001 when the terribly tragic events of that day occurred.
Our young New York woman has a created a diary at diaryland.com and has adopted the pseudonym "Party Girl". Party Girl lives with several roommates in an apartment in midtown Manhattan. She is single, works as a publicist and is originally from a small Pennsylvania community near Philadelphia. She grew up in a relatively comfortable livestyle and appears to have had a happy childhood, spending summers at a vacation home at the New Jersey shore. Currently, she lives a bohemian lifestyle, if we are to believe that the entries in her diary are factual, partying the nights away in Manhattan bars. She records her thoughts into her diary at various times of the day
and night, both at work and at home, much as one would if they had a private diary where they kept their private thoughts under lock and key, comfortably tucked away in some safe hiding place. However, Party Girl's private thoughts are not locked away, they are out there for all the world to see. If the site counter is accurate, her site has had a phenomenal number of hits.
Entries to Party Girl's diary are made every few days or so and she has been recording her periodic entries since November 18, 1999. Party Girl is well educated, intelligent, sassy, sarcastic, disillusioned, confused and vulgar. The vulgarity is required by her present station in life as a metropolitan young woman on her way up and hip to all things of consequence in her nonconventional world. She appears to be iconoclastic in her attitude about many things. She and her peers believe they are in a happening place, the center of the universe, as it were, where they all appear to be searching, endlessly searching for something...they do not seem to know exactly what they are searching for or what it would take to make them content with their existence. If you delve into Party Girl's published thoughts in her diary you come to believe that she and all of her friends are as actors on a stage with each actor trying desparately to upstage the other, to be the center of attention, if only for a moment. They all seem to be miserable and most lead miserable existences. They are desparately seeking a way out of the labyrinth that imprisons them. This seems a shallow and lonely existence.
When one reads diary entries up until the events of September 11th one must bear in mind that Party Girl is a publist by trade and she writes because it is addictive, it's her passion. And honestly, she is quite good at it. But, she writes for an audience and therefore she writes to entertain, to dazzel, to titilate. That is not to say that what she writes is fantasy or fiction, but the temptation to embellish, to exaggerate must be overwhelming. However, this said, the one entry prior to September 11 that seems to be totally honest and forthwith, the entry that perhaps divulges the real person behind the facade that she hides behind is the entry of March 11, 2001. This entry was written immediately after the wedding of her oldest girlfriend and in this entry she pens rememberances of her lifelong relationship with this best friend. (The March 11, 2001 entry can be accessed by clicking on the word 'friends' at the bottom of the September 11th entry (one of three) that is denoted as having been made at 3:34 p.m. on September 11, 2001.
Party Girl got a wake call on the morning of September 11, 2001. With the Attack on America and the horrible events of the terrorism that struck New York, and after the initial shock and fear, she got her act together and from that point forward appears to have recorded her true feelings, thoughts and emotions. She records the events that consumed her, and in one or another the entire world, in a straight forward and poignant manner. Gone is the glib and sassy style of previous entries.
For pure emotion without pretense or window-dressing, one must read the entries that begin on September 11...that fateful day when the world and the United States in particular, was turned on it's ear. That day of unfathomed terror, destruction and devastation that will haunt all of us for the rest of our lives. The day when thousands of innocent, unsuspecting lives were lost in a senseless act of terrorism.
Regardless of what you may think of Party Girl's hedonistic lifestyle or whether you appreciate her choice of music (personally I am a fan of Phil Collins' music), the diary entries commencing on September 11 are poignant, riveting, sad and thought provoking and very, very emotional. It is evident that the words and thoughts in the ensuing diary entries come from the heart. They represent an outpouring of raw emotions; anger, sadness, disbelief, bewilderment, confusion, fear, determination, denial, resolve, grief and finally acceptance.
Be forewarned, the language is sometimes vulgar and may shock the sensitivities of some. Because the emotions and thoughts expressed are pure the first inclination was to leave the language unedited. But, because the entries have been imported to this site, for ease of navigation, it was felt that a compromise was in order. The entries have been edited to the extent that all but the first letter of objectionable words have been replaced with dashes (----). If you wish to view the unedited version, click on the appropriate link at the bottom of this page.
It is suggested that you first view the pictures of the devastation before reading the extracts from Party Girl's diary. You will find a link to the diaries on the last page of the series of pictures. A link to the beginning of the series of pictures and also to the diary extracts can be found at the bottom of this page.
Party Girl appears to be a lost soul, searching desparately for symmetry and congruity in her life. She is unhappy in her job and in her existence. Perhaps she will experience a catharsis as a result of her experiences during the days that followed the dreadful events of recent date and perhaps she will come out the other side a more mature and responsible individual. Following the terrorist attacks she has certainly demonstrated that she possesses these traits. Perhaps...just perhaps she can make a clean break, folllow her heart and pursue the things she is truly passionate about. I truly hope so!